Family psychologist Irina Obukhova in a conversation with Pravda.Ru shared her thoughts about music that can be dangerous for child development and answered the question of whether it is necessary to control what your child listens to.
The psychologist is sure that a parent cannot always and not control everything, even if he really wants to. It is possible to control the actions of a child only up to a certain age – adolescence, when a daughter or son breaks away from parental inner roots and plunges into a teenage subculture, which, quite likely, parents do not like.
“There are things that you cannot control, and if you control them, then the child goes through some stages. He will listen in adolescence anyway to what is accepted in his environment. But the question of how dangerous or not dangerous it is depends on that you have invested before,” Obukhova said.
The psychologist believes that the main task of parents is not to control, but to prepare good ground, while the child’s age allows it. The main thing is not to control, but to guide and help to figure it out, then later you will not have to control his choice at a more conscious age.
“The word “control” here is twofold for one simple reason: in order to control or not control something, you need to understand one simple thing, that for this, in order to control later or at some stage, you need not control, but direct. the age when the child is directed, when you lay … You direct the child. And then you no longer have to control the choice. Not to mention the fact that he cannot help but belong to his subculture. There are rules of the game. They all listen to it. And he too listen. But another thing is that he will draw his conclusion, “the expert concluded.